Aaron and Pogues are joined by Eric again as we debate the most random of things. Music, youTube Jeans music videos and a bet to see how many times Pogues mentions porn (results are still being protested by Pogues). Our shortest offering, but not for lack of trying. Hope to get back in the studio this month to record #7.

Drop us a line at cradiopodcast on twitter, contradictionradio@gmail.com or follow us on facebook to let us know how we are doing, topics you want us to cover or just to let us know we suck.

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“What can you say about Kanye West that he hasn’t already said about himself in 75,000 tweets?” -Drunk Aaron

Alright y’all. Two things:

1. Pogues and I agreed to listen to Paste’s top 50 of 2010 and talk about it on the show.

2. I made a promise to myself recently:  Make a conscious effort to stop being such a critical and hateful prick about new music. However, I found that adherence to such yields really boring and condescending sounding results for music I am not interested in. I also thought I would have more honest and fun things to say if I drank myself into a stupor during the process. So what happened? I became a hateful prick… fortunately I can say these cowardly things since I have a snowball’s chance in hell of becoming a legitimate music journalist. Onward!

Here are the notes.. Aaron’s listening log.

Legend:
+= good
* = bad
# = What the fuck
blank = meh

Pre-Report drink count: 6oz Patron Tequila.

+50. Local Natives – “Sun Hands” – Dug it. Marching stick hit drums. Good harmonies. Interesting lyrics. Not great, but good.

49. Tallest Man on Earth – “Burden of Tomorrow” – Bob Dylan guy. Ugh.

48. April Smith and the Great Picture Show – “Colors” – Apple commercial.

47. Beach House – “Norway” – Alright. Emily has played this before. Shoegazey. Not bad.

#46. Free Energy – “Free Energy” – Pop punk vocals… Production sounds like it was from the 80’s and not even in a retro “ironic” way… wait… is this the Cars? With some kid singing they found at the mall? This wouldn’t sound out of place on a classic rock radio station. Damnit, there’s 2 minutes left.

45. Joanna Newsom – “Good Intentions Paving Company” – I thought I was in church briefly. Liked that the drummer seems to be doing whatever he/she wants but, too much gospel influence for me. Goddamn this is boring… Statboy Chris probably listens to this just to get girls.

44. BLK JKS – “Zol!” – I want to move it like Bernie to this. I think this was actually on the soundtrack to Weekend at Bernie’s 2, the part where he’s bitten by a shark in mid-air? Not sure what language this is, but I like it better that way.

*43. Sarah Jaffe – “Clementine” – Uh oh, I feel some singer-songwriter rubbish coming on. Voice is good and even though I do not intend to, this is beginning to sound like a female Pete Yorn. (Which is the worst possible insult I could levy.) Lyrics have consisted of “I feel undefined” and “all this time wasted.” Feels like it’s coming out my old LiveJournal. I thought I deleted that thing…

Drink Log: Begin clearance bin 24 oz Tall Boy of Labatt Blue, one shot 80 proof Canadian Whiskey

+42. Deerhunter – “Helicopter” – Throwing me a curveball up front? Will I be shaking my ass from this beat in a minute? Nope, apparently I should praying instead, but I still dig it. A lot of layers, it’s getting downright loud at minute 3. Pretty good.

41. The Walkmen – “Stranded” – Would hate to hear what it would sound like if the home team was losing. I guess he’s done with the marching band now. It’s OK.

40. Sufjan Stevens – “I Walked” – I wonder if the full name of the song is “I walked from one obscure dilapidated rust belt town in to another.” A lot electronic stuff happening, had to look again to make sure I clicked the right button, but this is definitely Sufjan… wow, he sounds a eerily close to Justin Timberlake at the end of his verses. Goddamnit, do I actually like this? At least there’s some resentment for his overdramatic apology for not cleaning the floor before he left.

39. Dr. Dog – “Stranger” – AT&T commercial with an occasional funky bassline.

38. Belle & Sebestian – “I want the world to stop” – The track concluded with applause that was not mine. I couldn’t remember a single thing about the song otherwise, even directly after it was over.

*37. Jamey Johnson – “Poor Man Blues”- Holy shit, got a little country in this bitch! I have an incredible urge to drink whiskey again. I really wish the lyrics didn’t make it sound like it belonged at a Tea Party rally. Are you listening CEO’s? You don’t know shit about the poor man blues!

+36. New Pornographers – “Crash Years” – We’re walking somewhere… hopefully away from more generic tea party angst. Starts out like any other boring indie pop song, but the difference is the chorus is actually catchy. Really liked the vocalist and listened to it a few times. Probably wouldn’t buy an album, though.

35. The Black Keys – “Tighten Up” – I feel like I’ve heard this song a few times already. I want to now propose a moratorium on that “twangy vintage garage rock guitar tone” just to see what indie pop artists would do without it. Also, I want to have a worldwide flanger pedal burning (or whatever the effect is that comes in at 3:05.) Not terrible, but I don’t really want to hear anymore. They’re from Akron, so I forgive them.

34. Avi Buffalo – “Truth Sets In” – Uh oh, an acoustic guitar slowly fading in… not a good sign. Luckily, I’m a sucker for harmonics which is about the only thing that I remembered 30 seconds after the song ended.

33. Freelance Whales – “Hannah” – I hope this band is not as bad as their name. Love their choice of instruments and would like the band a lot better if they kicked Travis Morrison-doing-a-Ben-Gibbard impression guy out of the band.

#32. Magic Kids – “Hey Boy” – Can you be nostalgic for a musical time period that you did not live in? Shit in the 50’s was recorded better than this.

31. Surfer Blood – “Floating Vibes” – BOOOOOOOOOORING, does Paste only like crappy garage rock?

*****30. Gorillaz – “Stylo” – Is Damon Albarn going to phone this one in too? Shit, I wrote that before phone effect came in on the vocals. There must be a huge cash grab for repetitive electronic music nowadays. (Note to self: MAKE ELECTRONIC RECORD) I am incredibly confused by the sudden presence of a soul singing in the middle of the song. I feel the only proper thing to do with this song is to soundtrack an overpriced pants purchase at Urban Outfitters.

++29. Suckers – “It gets your Body Movin” – Wow, sweet relief. I like this a lot, but it might be the hangover and juxtaposition of being played after a shit Gorillaz song. All sorts of little things interesting things going on. Vocals remind me a bit of Honcho Overload and Man Man. Interesting layering and tempo changes. The breakdown in the middle of the song with the whistling and piano hits was great. Also not the Gorillaz, so that’s a plus.

28. Vampire Weekend – “Horchata” – Pogues will remind everyone how much I’ve shit on this band in the past. What is the fascination with this band? So far no crappy ska up picking on guitar, that’s a welcome gesture. Any time this guy is not singing the song is OK.

+27. Yeasayer – “Ambling Amp” – Has a slight 80’s influence to the vocals and the reverb on the snare drum, two things that would usually drive me to swearing/drinking, but there’s enough other interesting things happening to ignore it. Pretty catchy, really. Nothing says 80’s pop like a good steel drum, but the one at the end of the song is trigger sampled and manipulated to sound kind of fucked up. I think I could dance to this. I am reminded of 80’s and don’t want to kill myself.

26. Stornaway – “Zorbing” – Meh.

25. Josh Ritter – “Change of Time” – Acoustic guitar guy. This guy doesn’t sound like Bob Dylan at all, but if Bob Dylan wasn’t so talented/frail/old, I would punch him in the face for ever becoming a reference point for college guys trying to get laid that later pursue a music career and are taken seriously. But then again, if he weren’t so talented, he wouldn’t be a reference point. OK some not acoustic guitar guy shit is happening now and it’s not so bad… but I’ve already written this song off. Jesus, is this shit over yet? Time for another drink!

Drink Log: 2nd clearance bin 24 oz Tall Boy of Labatt Blue, one shot 80 proof Canadian Whiskey

24. Justin Townes Earle – “Harlem River Blues” – This is the most gospel sounding song I’ve ever heard about suicide. I’m noticing a resurgence of choir use. I guess musicians only have access to a vintage guitar amp, 80’s drum machine or have a choir handy these days. OK I GET IT! YOU’RE GOING UPTOWN TO SILENTLY DROWN YOURSELF! The song ended during that sentence, on to the next one!

#23. Lil Wayne – 6’7” – I guess these garage rock loving assholes needed to throw a prominent hip-hop artist a bone to put some variety in the list. But they fucked up. No… for real, I am familiar enough with Weezy to know he did NOT rap at all in the song they have linked. I don’t know what that shit was, but after some research, I got to hear the real 6’7” …. It was alright. But have I even been listening to the right songs? Is Paste just fucking with us? Goddamnit Josh Jackson, has the last hour of my life been a total mislinked drunken farce?!?!

22. Mark Ronson & The Business International – “Bang Bang Bang” – After the realization that the previous track I was listening to was not what it was labeled, I was a bit skeptical about Mr. Ronson because it sounded a lot like Rihanna and Q-tip doing vocals. Well, after some research, I was one-half right. But seriously… forget this shit and get fucking Tribe back together Q!

21. Band of Horses – “Laredo” – I always get the Horse bands confused and people get pissed at me. I also get animal bands confused which is ironic because I played in one. I guess now I am aided in telling Horse the Band apart from Band of Horses because this shit is pretty mehhhhhh. Two chord indie rock. Am I the only person bored by this?

+20. Big Boi – “Shutterbug” – I tend to favor Andre 2000’s solo shit when it comes to Outkast, but I enjoyed this. Beat was good, typical Outkast delivery. Sounds like I am playing guitar because it’s vaguely out of tune and sloppy. Oh shit, Soul II Soul reference. Man I’d dance to this if I didn’t have to piss so bad.

19. Florence & the Machine – “Dog Days are Over” – The intro is a Hyundai commercial in waiting. Surf Rock drums are apparently really in style too. This girl can belt a bit… but sounded a little bit like Imogen Heap in the beginning. It’s not horrible. She ain’t no Bjork, but Bjork ain’t Bjork most of the time… whatever the fuck that means.

+18. Jonsi – “Go do” – I have a consistently giant boner for Sigur Ros, so naturally I love this. I love it even more because I can see Pogues writhing in pain having to listen to it.

17. Arcade Fire – “Sprawl II” – Maybe I am drunk enough to be in the mood for this bullshit now, although I keep waiting for the singer to break into “Oh What a Night.” This seems like it could be exit music for whatever half-deep happy ending chick flick your girlfriend/girl you wanna fuck might torture you with.

16. Broken Bells – “The High Road” – My goddamned wife will not shut up about this band. I think she will damn near bankrupt us to see them live since nobody cool tours Ohio. It’s not bad, I kind of dig the vocal harmonies in the verse. I think a dial up modem is trying to connect during the chorus.

15. Lissie – “Little Lovin” – I had severe doubts about a song sung by someone named Lissie. It wasn’t what I expected, but it wasn’t good either. I hope she gets to heaven, or whatever bullshit she wants to do.

14. Robyn – “Dancing on my Own” – I wonder if Lissie knows Robyn. Is the world full of one name pop star premadonnas now? That being said, this is a dumb teen dance pop song sang by a Kylie Minogue imposter that has a decent beat and I guess this girl can sing. At this point in the evening, I can’t really argue with that. Man, Kylie Minogue is pretty hot for 60 or however old she is.

13. Caribou – “Odessa” – Again with the electronic music. Shit, I missing my meal ticket right now! I’m pretty sure I’ve heard my wife play this track before. Jesus, she’s about 1000 times more hip than me. If she’s not leaving me right now, I’d be surprised.

**12. Phosphorescent – “It’s Hard to Be Humble” – I am beginning to regain faith in humanity and it’s not because of this shit song. Maybe as a global society we are truly opening our minds and accepting new… and old… and weird and terrible music. There was a moment during this song I thought I was listening to Lynyrd Skynyrd. Why? Why are people doing shit like that? It’s probably really fun, but I don’t want to hear it.

Drink log: 80 proof Canadian Whiskey and coke

++11. The Middle East – “Blood” – I dig this song. I think it’s the xylophone that’s doing it for me. Perhaps I am drunk enough now to lose my reasoning ability. I can’t list one offensive quality about this song and I like the band name even though it’s a “The” band.

10. Kanye West – “Runaway” – What can you say about Kanye West that he hasn’t already said about himself in 75,000 tweets? I remember this song from his performance on SNL. Kanye is an incredible producer and songwriter and the minute he raps about something substantial, I’ll be in. I mean, this song starts with him recalling him sending a picture of his dick to someone? This is the most dramatic song about illicit photo sending that we’ll probably ever hear. Of course, it’s not just about that I’m sure. Next!

09. Titus Andronicus – “A More Perfect Union” – Holy shit it’s the singer from Jets to Brazil fronting Kyuss! Shit, no it’s not… now it’s a crappy guitar solo. Nope! Moving on!

08. Preservation Hall Jazz band with Tom Waits “Tootie Ma is a Big Fine Thing” – I’m almost willing to grant Tom Waits a pass on anything, but I am severely confused by this. Is this actually Waits singing? Is this a live recording? Damnit Paste! Can you be trusted? I refuse to research it.

Drink log: Shot of 80 proof Canadian Whiskey

07: The National – “Bloodbuzz Ohio” – My roommate talks this band up a lot, but I am immediately prejudiced against “The” bands. I think he might give this song some favor because Ohio is the subject, but it’s probably not in the top 10 songs about Ohio. Maybe it’s slightly ahead of “Ohio is for Lovers” or possibly a tie. Perhaps the lyrics improve this song, but right now I can’t tell what the fuck this guy is saying and I don’t care. Apparently this poor dumb bastard got dumped in Ohio by a swarm of bees, but the bees probably left Ohio for Portland, like everyone else in Ohio.

Paste 50 Song Challenge from Contradiction Radio on Vimeo.

06. LCD Soundsystem – “Dance Yourself Clean” – You know what? I fucking love LCD Soundsystem and I don’t have to even listen to him to know this. This dude is the great white fat guy hope that all of us fat white guy needs. I still have hope to become a “pop star” (aka, make enough money to not give a shit) if this dude is out and about. Oh yeah. The song was OK, except he called me an “actual jerk,” I think. In fact, I was too ripe with fat white guy righteousness to pay attention.

05. Frightened Rabbit – “Swim until you can’t see land” – If purgatory was a song, this would be it. “Is this Counting Crows?” – Schulte, Roommate

++04. Sleigh Bells – “Tell ‘em” – Jesus holy god, I think my eardrums just blew. I’m hoping that they wrote this song with strip clubs in mind because I am fantasizing about fliff night at Cheek’s (local gentleman’s club) and I don’t even like that place. Plus, that place plays “Freebird” for strippers and is in desperate need of something else. I dig it. Christ, this is loud. Like like like.

03. Janelle Monae – “Tightrope” – Is this Beyonce’s side project?

02. Mumford & Sons – “Little Lion Man” – What happened to Sanford? Harharhar… Forgive my Dad joke, I just… I just don’t know what to say about the song. More acoustic guitar based indie rock. Oh, there’s a banjo I think… I don’t know… It’s alright, I guess… Jesus, I’m fucking hungry.

Drink Log: Final shot of 80 proof Canadian Whiskey

#1 song of 2010 Cheers from Contradiction Radio on Vimeo.

01. Cee Lo Green – “Fuck you” – Ah yes… the #1 song of the year of 2010 is a novelty song. Seriously though, without this song, I would not have found this amazing young lady that I have just informed my wife that I am leaving her for:

My Podcast Alley feed!

Post-Scripts/Corrections:
-Spex’s real name, Weezer Payoff, Butchered EL-P quote, Another goddamned Resident Evil movie.

-Editors note: Aaron knows people named Bobby and thanks for writing in!

Dead Prez – The show was great, but the taxi ride back was more memorable.

Circa 2004. (The photo Pogues referred to.)

Corrections/Post-scripts:

Pop Science, The question was: “In your opinion, worst song from the past 20 years that people, for whatever reason, generally tend to enjoy. No explanation necessary.” Vote in the poll for the finalists as determined by Contradiction Radio!

Hipster Superman – Also, random Heath Ledger suicide theory!

We (finally) bring in our “Outside Nerd Consultant” and video game blogger Ben Chapman to talk about video games, comics and movies and is subjected to our first rapid fire segment!

Show notes:

-Aaron tortures Pogues with the Olsen Twins “Pizza song slowed down.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wusGIl3v044

-Intro song offer

-Post-Script/Corrections

-Other Podcasts and shoutouts

-Segway owner/company death

-ASCAP/BMI collections

-Weezer’s Blue/Pinkerton tour

-Aaron’s failed capitalist plot

-Pogues rages

Also, we got a Skype (w/voicemail) account for the show. Want any questions or comments answered on the show? Want to be ridiculed in a way that you can’t defend yourself? Hit us up! Search “contradictionradio” in the Skype client and you should find us!

Want to participate in our intro/promo song? Call and leave us a message telling us how much hate our show. DO NOT call and tell us you like it! Just tell us what unadulterated trash it is!

Episode 1, Topic guide:

-Intro song: El-P remixes “Baby.” Thanks Ben for the link.

-Take a drink every time we say Hipster. Thanks Chris for the link.

-Godspeed You! Black Emperor reunites, what could Weird Al have to do with it?

-If you can’t beat Justin Bieber, just slow his songs down 800%. Also, El-P trolling and white guilt.

-Scott Pilgrim movie, why the hell does everyone know about Scott Pilgrim but me?

-Duke Nukem Forever: insert “Forever” joke here. Also, Aaron rages about World of Warcraft.